I find that 2am is always the time that I site down and ask myself do I want to blog right now. I guess it’s because my mind is always active at this time. I have been so busy as of late that I barely have time to do the things that need to get done let alone the ones I want to get done. As a result blogging has taken a back seat. I also think that due to the nature of my relationship with Elizabeth that my desire to express my internal dialog no longer exists. I think that due to the nature of a long distance relationship much of what I would normaly internalize has to be vocalized. When coupled with the fact that very little often needs to be explained to her for her to understand what I am thinking or feeling and the need to blog disappears entirely. Sometimes, however, it is just necessary to write it out. In fact, it almost feels good to blog again.

This is all fine and dandy but the reason I felt drawn to blog was because I felt the need to put a few thoughts in list form. Truth be told, I probably wouldn’t be here typing if there wasn’t a three hour time difference between California and Pennsylvania. Regardless, here it is:

1. Lent is hard, and while I have succeeded at some things I find myself failing at others. Worse yet, my desire to simply uphold something with God for forty days, and my inability to do so, really does bother me. I feel like if I cant go forty days how am I to do anything.
2. While the above statement does bother me I am at least thankful that I am aware of the fact that God is working within my life. I feel like I am in a constant state of change. So much so that I can probably list everything I have felt called to do/change in my life for the last 6 months. The downside to all this is that at times it can all be a little overwhelming.
3. I hope Drew doesn’t join the Army. At least wait for a new President if you must.
4. I am in desperate need of a way to get to Pennsylvania for as little money as possible. Any suggestions would be great.
5. I am now tired
6. I miss Elizabeth and if it isn’t apparent that I think about her a lot in this blog post just image how much more of my thought process she consumes.

Burke Shartsis

Define: Blog - “A frequently updated journal or diary”

Sometimes I forget why I started a blog. I just remembered why a few moments ago. I just finished watching a really not that emotional movie but it kind of triggered a train wreck. You know that feeling of when you have been holding things back for so long and then when one small thing happens it just comes out. Sometimes this happens at bad, inopportune times and sometimes its just a silly Adam Sandler movie on tv. Well, I was sitting there and when the movie ended it just all came out. It was… for lack of a better word, real. I am now sick to my stomach and I feel like a train just hit me. It’s amazing how life changes. A friend reminded me recently of the role God plays in our lives if we let him. Well… Lord here I am. Show me your path, show me whats next.

Burke Shartsis

I woke up this morning, after a dream filled nights sleep, completely restless. My apartment smells like bacon and Mike is gone. I performed my normal morning pattern of email, facebook, and scanning the news. I got up to wander around my apartment and stopped to look out my kitchen window. It’s a beautiful fall day. The tree outside my window has lost most of its leaves as the wind blows them around on the ground. I watched the mail man as he put the mail in my buildings boxes. As he finished, I realized that my restlessness was due in part to my desire for something to happen. I would be happy with anything really. I think I have been living like this for a few weeks now. Living each moment hoping something will happen in the next. Something exciting. Something worth being happy for. I suppose this moment is coming to an end. I hope something happens in the next…

Burke Shartsis

It’s 3:30 am. I can’t sleep. I’m not productive. I have Europe on the brain. I’ll try to start blogging more. Maybe I’ll I have more short posts like this.

Burke Shartsis

So me and Gary went on out for our third adventure. For those of you wondering who Gary is, my bicycle is a Gary Fisher. So being that the brand is a name I refer to my bike as if it is a real person and just call it Gary. The first was already mentioned on my blog and the second was… well… none existence. To make a short story even shorter, we went out and my partners chain broke about one minute into the trail. So back to present day, I went out today because I happen to be in an area I knew was close to some trails, so I packed up the necessary goods for my ride and proceeded with my days plans. For those interested I met my Mom and Dad at the Renaissance Fair in Casa De Fruta. It was fun… short lived but fun nonetheless. So I left and headed of to go mountain biking when my parents had gotten their fill of all things rennaissance. After I had gotten things situated I started my ride. Just like when I run, I just kind of went and figured it all out as I went; no need to read trail maps and stuff. I ended up climbing a pretty good hill. It was somewhere between 1.5-2 miles of trail up and there was a little loop at the top for an additional .9 miles and then I took a different trail down that I saw intersected my upward route. In all I probably road 4-5 miles. Not that far but the terrain more then made up for it and it was late in the day. The story in all this is that me and Gary finally got to know each other and it was exciting. I think Gary need some new brakes though. Anywho… that is my story. It was a good day… I just wish I could have done a bit more thinking. My emotions feel unresolved. Well, thats it… I’ll be sure to start packing a camera for these adventures. The view of silicon valley was amazing.

Adept

First, I would like to say this is my 98th blog post making me just two shy of the big 100. I don’t know what I will do for the achievement but stay tuned for details.

As some of you may know, I value my friendships vary highly. I often feel like few of my friends realize just how much they mean to me but it is to be expected I assume. I have not been blogging much as the mindset seems to have escaped me as of late. I don’t really have much to say to the world but to my friends… I love and miss you. That is all I have to say….

Adept

So I took Gary to the bike shop and he is doing great now. I refer to my bike as Gary and as if it is a real person so bear with me. The bike is a Gary Fisher so its not that strange. So I decided me and Gary were going to go for a ride. So I looked up some parks and trails and such and I took off with Gary for a ride at 6:30pm or so knowing that it was going to get dark soon. The trip started well. I started on a paved trail and road on it for about a minute until it turned into a dirt trail which quickly became just some dirt next to some railroad tracks. I kept riding and it turned back into a dirt trail but that then turned into like a walking path (smaller then a trail type thing) but I kept going. Along the way there was trash and random homeless shanties set up. I had seen the maps, all the parks were part of a series of parks that were connected. So I kept going… and my path got smaller and smaller until I was riding real slow and dodging branches and such. I then came to a spot where the “trail” now not even really a path was unridable by bike. So I turned around and it was then that I realized that I was kind of in a homeless village. I thought for a second. I could hear someone moving a bit and could see his head hidden in the trees. I road back to a spot where I could see him and asked if he knew a way through to the other side but he didn’t answer. I asked twice before I decided the catatonic homeless man that was staring at me and the world around him as if it was something new he had never experience before wasn’t going to be helpful so I just back tracked a bit to the nearest street. From there I proceeded to my goal of trying to ride on some trails and such. So I headed south some more and worked my way back to the “parks” in hopes I would find the trail I had be kicked off of. I eventually got to the paved trail again that I had found online and headed down that with excitement. The trail dipped down by the near by creek and was under the canopy of the tree’s so it was much darker. I road on this for about all of one minute before I realized that this was no more of a trail then any other part of this ghetto ass trip so much as it was just a more official path to yet more homeless shanties. Not being in the mood for any more of the type of trip this had become I decided to take the fastest and most direct city streets home. My trip back brought me through ghetto ass neighborhood after ghetto ass neighborhood. At one point I could see some kids from a distance sitting on corner with their bikes and scooters and as I road by they fallowed me with there eyes. It was rather creepy. I passed a crazy women who was hacking at a bush in between the sidewalk and the street as if it was soon to be her dinner. I was nearly hit by more cars then I can count being that people could really give a shit if your on a bike. I finally got back 10 miles later and came to the conclusion that San Jose is one GHETTO ASS CITY and that future bike trips would not be planned the same way. Lesson learned. The end. True story.

Adept

Below is a link to a high definition airsoft video shot at Fort Ord. The game was put on by Round House productions who is lucky enough to have someone film at their games. I happen to have a starring roll about twenty seconds in which is fallowed by a short clip of my roommate Mike. I suggest you watch it as I am now famous. Also, there is some footage of a guy with a mp5 that has an auto returning moving bolt cover. It looks wicked cool and if anybody has any information on it that would be great. As I mentioned the video is in high definition so the download may take a while (broadband required) but its worth your time.

Adept

Operation Junkyard Dog

It would appear that I have fallen off the face of the earth and no longer blog. That my friends is untrue. I will leave out the details and just say that my life has had some major changing moments. These along with camp ending and school starting up have kept me rather busy and unable to blog. I will say, however, that my return to the blog-o-sphere will be soon and when it happens it will be big. I have new photos to post, new projects to debut, new albums to review, and new technologies to report on. So for right now I apologise but I’ll be back… soon…

Adept

Around noon yesterday I went to Moraga, Ca for the second time to look at and this time purchase my new car. By new I mean used of course but you would never know if you looked at it. Its absolutely everything I wanted in a car and I really couldn’t be happier. I threw some pictures up on the gallery and below are the specs for those who care:

Make: Subaru
Model: Impreza Outback Sport
Year: 1999
Transmission: 5 speed manual
Mileage: 83,900
Color: White on slate

Adept